A sorry state

Is there a way to know what you really want to do? Not just feel something in a fuzzy way in your head, but know something right into your bones and muscles so that everything you do mirrors what you really want.

Tragedies often bring this helpless feeling where you want to do something but you have no clue how or what. I sat miles away from home and read how my home state was ravaged by the flash rains with no administrative preparedness to handle any conceivable natural tragedy. I sat miles away from home and read when a freak accident wrecked a friend’s life- you get electrocuted in a Delhi shopping area because no one cares about having unsafe electric wirings conducting electricity all the way to your parked car.

I don’t want to write any further, because the sad truth is all my current agitation is futile..

Movie review-'Before..' trilogy

This will have to be the kind of movie that could possibly lie somewhere in my imagination. Or maybe this is the kind of movie that I would have loved to imagine by myself. In either case it is but understandable that I absolutely love it.

I am talking about Linklater, Delpy and Hawke in the ‘Before’ trilogy- Before Sunrise, Before Sunset & Before Midnight. I finished watching the latest installment yesterday and thought of writing briefly about them. The movies are all about conversations that mirror life, conversations between two people in different contexts, different cities and different times of their life. The tone of the conversation changes as life takes them through different phases and the viewer can picture their life together through their 'long conversations'.. Each of the three movies focus on a different phase of life.

In the lives we live, we talk all the time with everyone around but we share the magical ease of talking or even silence with only a few people. However the magic is not just about two people, it is also about the place and the movie captures it beautifully in the picturesque backdrop of Europe. Since it is a movie it plays out in Vienna, Paris & Greece but for the lowly people not in the movie business alternative arrangements often surface out magically in our backyard all in course of a good conversation!

I guess for me the whole premise of loving the movie is the fact that I know the joy of such conversations. If I  try to draw a physical parallel for a good conversation I'd say it is like exchanging a volley over tennis net without keeping score. You run, you stretch, you challenge-play the offensive, you collaborate-play the easy shots. You just keep the flow going and the ball from hitting the ground. Now I don’t play tennis so this analogy may be technically incorrect but I watched a game few days back and I felt that this mental image was closest to what i wanted to say. A good conversation is like a game- it’s about timing, pace, humor, challenge and having fun. The two characters in the movie know how to play this game of verbal exchanges and it’s a delight to watch.

The movie is also a delectable character study, in the course of their conversations you feel as if you know them in flesh and blood. You understand how each of them thinks and how differently from the other. They bring different perspective to the same conversation, to the same situation. They bring with them their different upbringings, their different cultures and you can sense it clearly. I think the worst conversations for me are the ones where someone tries to sound like you. They might have the best intent but the moment they lose their original selves, it’s a tedious exchange- it’s no fun to listen to you. I can at least say that for myself-(I can bore myself to death, heaven save the listeners).

I purposefully didn't talk about the plot, I think it is the execution that really matters here. Meeting the love of your life in a train journey in Europe is straight from some romanticist's playbook and I would have been the first person to dismiss it, but here I am raving about the movie. A good reason to watch it I say!

The day called Birthday

We need celebrations in life to break the monotony of living, and we reserve special celebrations for the day when this chain of living started- the birthday celebration
Each year we have a story of how we celebrated this day last year and over the years this one day can serve as a good pointer of life. Some birthdays are just stellar, some not so great but still there is always a silver lining, some loved one manages to salvage the day for you :)

I can try to describe the birthday celebrations with the help of some alliteration I remember from early childhood-
Cut, Cute, Cake
Do, Disco, Dance
Sing, Sweet, Song
Live, Long, Life
This is how we signed the birthday cards with generous wishes for the benefactor distributing birthday sweets in class. The sweets were ‘Ravalgon’ one year then moved to ‘Dhishum toffee’, ‘Cofffee Bite’, ‘Alpenliebe’ and I guess by the time I reached college, kids in schools had graduated to ‘Centre Shock’- who wants the boring sweetness after all for the birthday. I am not the most updated person but I am sure the kids generation today must have found a way cooler way to celebrate birthdays than our dinosaur generation who flaunted a super frilly frock with matching hair bands on this day and gifts that parents chose for us!

So we have covered all things sweet so far and we can now move forward to the tradition of giving gifts and how it gets complicated with every passing year. All humans are not born equal, some are better gift givers and some are hopeless at this skill. Gifts are difficult because it entails making a judgement both at the givers and the receivers end. How big? How small? Does it? Does it not?
All these questions somehow go into formula to calculate the ‘special quotient’, you have no control over the variables, no one knows the exact formula but each one of us imperfectly run these calculations. However all I care is I manage to smile and get a smile in return..

Birthdays in the Facebook generations have advanced in some more ways. Somehow now the entire world knows that it is your special day. 'Rosetta stone' & 'Starbucks' wants you to send a birthday gift to your friend. Google will celebrate your birthday with a special doodle and on clicking the dooddle your own profile on Google+ will open. A bunch of emails from some other services will also be there to greet you in your mailbox. Welcome to the party unwanted attention!

But most importantly, birthdays are the day to stop and appreciate the people you have in your life who try to make the day special for you in their own way.We need a day when friends should make a call and wish you if they want to stay in your good books.We sure need a day to feel loved and appreciated!

This post is dedicated to bhai and bainu and thank you for the special musical performance!